Looking Back

Have you ever tried looking back to the start of your life until now? Have you ever thought what if something were to never have happened or never have appeared in you life? Well, I have numerous times and there happens to be a lot of people who happen to be really important in my life. The people who without I would’ve just been quite a useless person.

People who revolve around your life, even a person who told you only one statement could be very important in your life. Just one statement could make a very big impact in a person’s life. I’m glad that these people are in my life. I couldn’t imagine what I could have been without these people.

My grandparents, although one of them left me few years back, they’ve been really kind to me. They thought me a lot on their life stories and also passed down the kind heart to me.

My parents, how can I be here without them right? Well, my dad thought me a lot on his lectures. He’s a man who reasons and I respect him for that.

My brothers, without them I wouldn’t have done anything to improve my physical fitness. They guided me through my early stages of life. Fights are inevitable among brothers but in the end we’re still brothers who support each other even though we don’t show it.

Terrence Goh, my oldest friend. It’s been 12 or 13 years since we’ve known each other. Without him I’d just be an ordinary quiet student in my primary days. Following him has allowed me to not stay in the corners unnoticed. Though we aren’t that close anymore, he’s still a good friend of mine.

Teng Han Liang, we don’t go that far back compared to Terrence but we still go quite a while back. We go like 7-8 years back. I used to stay behind him in many things. He’s one of those who were noticed and having posts in many things while I was just some ordinary guy nobody knows. So all the while I was like being his assistant and get a bit noticed as well. Besides that, we shared ups and downs together

Lee Jun Hsien, we don’t go way back it’s just 3-4 years. I don’t recall us sharing ups and downs but instead he’s been helping me in my down times. He’s a real good friend of mine.

Chew Chien Loong, Lim Chong Sheng, Jerrard Leong, Kong Zhuo Li, and Jun Hsien. Our moments together as the school volleyball team this 3 years were priceless. We’re always buddies man. Other volleyballer, though we don’t go that far back, It’s still priceless our days training together and through MSSD.

Lee Kin Meng, Ong Dao Shen and Khor Zhi Yang. These 2 years in Ixora we’ve build up our friendship. Now we’re like 4 buddies in the corner. Especially Dao Shen who’s beside me, our thinking is like so similar. We’re definitely real buddies.

Caely See Yen Boon, she’s the only female who I’m actually writing. We’ve never been buddies in fact now I don’t know what are we. During my form 3 year I actually stopped my scouting activities but during form 4 years I actually followed her back into scouts. End up I found things that make me want to stay. I really have to thank her for that. Though the time we were actually friends who hangs out with each other was only a few months, those were great moments. I do hope we could be like last time but I guess it’s not possible but then I really hope we could at least be real friends. I know I always will take you as 1.

My other friends I could not possibly write all of you but well, all of my friends are important for me. Thank you I would like to say to all my friends and all those I wrote above. Without you all, I’m nothing.

YU

Changed - Have I?

This blog has been left alone for a month now. It’s not because I’m busy although I have been busy in the past month. So basically what made me stop writing for a month? It’s the many things going through my mind as things happened. I haven’t been feeling right these days. To be honest I’m kind of lost. I’ve always tried to view far, look at the far end of things but I tend to forget what’s near. I try to be someone in the future but now, in the process what have I become?

I am a person lacking of self-confidence very much. I try to change that or at least appear to others as not but I’ve lost myself. I became arrogant. I didn’t realize that, I thought I only gained a little arrogance but didn’t realize it grew in time. Maybe people do see me as more confident but with the prize of having arrogance which causes dislike on people? I don’t want that.

I’ve been reviewing myself on ability too much that I’ve forgotten my personality. I’ve been to full of every ability of mine. That can’t happen and I won’t let it happen anymore. But however, I need help. I need to know what has gone wrong with me or what is always wrong with me, my personality. Just honestly tell me, I don’t mind bad comments. I just wish to know, that’s all. Thank you.

Damian

Hate

What makes a person gets hated? What makes a person gets disliked? Many reasons can actually cause so. Usual points would be bad personalities, annoying and disrespectful words or actions. Of course, as I said this is usual points not all the points. There are numerous reasons for one to get hated or disliked. I wish to know why would I get hated or disliked as well. At least I know where people think I have problem in.

To be hated by a stranger I would feel slight discomfort but to be hated by a friend or someone closer that would really be painful. I wish to know what the reason but I wish more that the hate could be gone. To feel pain is never a good thing and to cause it is never as well. If it causes more than that but also things like inconvenience and all, the more the reason to get it settled.

Peace
Damian Leong

Views

People’s views change many times as time passes as people grow though how much it changes and how many times it does differ among people. Many things I see, many things I thought, many things within me has differ. When we were still young kids almost all the guys will have a ‘policemen’ as their top 3 ambition but as they grow up and see things differently, the number of those people who plan to have their profession as a policemen will be only a few.

Many times there are a lot of things I tend to not see in other views due to my stubbornness of believing my 1^st view is right even when it is not. Different people look at things in different views as well. To judge people in 1 view is quite a stupid thing to do. Every time I try to judge people I will like into every view that I can think of before judging that person.

Stepping into this year there’s a few views that I managed to see in a few things as well. A few things I realized as I was able to see these views. About love itself I realized a few things. That it is really not necessary to have the person love you back and it is most important that they’re happy. The other thing I guess I wouldn’t write it out here.

Peace
Damian Leong

Direction

The use of a compass is to tell you directions but if you do not know which direction to head, a compass is more or less useless. It’s like in life, even if we know which paths are good for career opportunity but if we don’t know what we want then it’s basically useless. I never support people to think about what they can work as to get rich or have a stable job with good pay. To have your interest as your job is always what I want and advice others to do.

I’m actually a bit lost now. I don’t really know what I actually want now. I feel discomfort of wanting to do something but I don’t know what. The only thing I know I want to do now is to achieve something special. To be recognized, acknowledged as someone special. But what can I do that's special?

Return

I won’t be able to post whenever I want anymore. I have to write privately now not letting anyone know I’m still doing it and I might be busy sometimes. So basically I’ll be late writing about any events.

Firstly the resuming of school life, well it’s not much difference. People didn’t really change and the class is still divided into and island, mainland, ocean, sea and boats. I’ve always dreamed of uniting the class into just 1 land but I realize I’m just a small raft. I can’t go to the ocean or the sea always, when there’s wave I’ll drown. Hope I can turn into a ship soon.

Now, I went Shanghai on the 2^nd day of school and skipped 3 days of school just for the trip. The trip was 5 days by the way. It was for my cousin’s wedding mainly. He’s an Australian guy marrying a Shanghai girl. In Shanghai it’s a bit hard for me to communicate. You can hardly find people who can speak English. Oh, and their England is so POWDERFUL! Check this out.

Ok now, a picture speaks a thousand words. Pictures.

The 2 star hotel I stayed in
My cousin Darren, his in-laws and the bride

The bride and groom
The day after the wedding we went here

Too bad it was too misty I couldn't take any picture of the view up there.

My cousin sister, Kimberly
Quite a good view but camera ran out of battery. Had to use my brother's phone to take.

The leaving day there was nothing to do. Therefore I took picture of myself through the mirror and together with me taking the room as well.

Back to reality now. No more holidays and all. Time to start working on the many stuff I need to or want to work on. An escape from reality once in a while is great. Refreshes your mind and gives you different views on things. But then again, if the time isn't that right when you come back many things you'll be blur. Alright, that's it.

Peace
Damian Leong

A New Year

2008, I’m a day late to talk about New Year aren’t I? Well, no matter late is better than never. 2007 was a great year for me I’ll say. For one who has lived the past 15 years in peaceful uneventful land, 2007 was like going to the rough ocean. Now, it’s the year 2008 already.

Before 2007 I was basically a nobody. I was practically just a normal quiet student who does nothing but play and study (not to say I study much though). Until 2007 I start to be more noticeable. I was back into scouts then getting a QM post, going for interact meetings then getting a membership director post, somehow got to be an assistant monitor although quite a useless one, realizing my interests thus planning future becomes possible and change due to certain reasons. Certain reasons not just a few though.

Those are basically the main things for me in 2007. Now in 2008 I just wish change in the way I want. I can’t see myself being successful yet but I’ll definitely keep trying. Being form 5 next year many of my same age friends are planning to put priority on SPM. I’m really sick of hearing people saying about SPM. My priority is on changing to be able to lead and not be a wimp. I won’t neglect my studies till I fail my subject but it’s not my priority to get straight A. It’s not even in my list.

There are certain things I realized in this New Year though I will not write out what is it. If asked I might tell but it’s only a ‘might’. Ahh, getting a bit too long. Wasn’t planning to write so long, sorry.

Peace
Damian Leong